It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...

I've only been back a couple days and I'm already sick of this new schedule...

My days consist of class after class broken up by hour-long breaks...long enough to eat or catch up on reading but not really long enough to take a much needed nap or get a much needed hug. After classes, I head to work til 8 o'clock, with the exception of Mondays, when I have a night class and choral union instead. By the time I get back to my dorm, all I want to do is curl up in his arms and fall asleep...unfortunately, that's not an option. Not just because of the rules around here but because he has practice and when he's done with that, he goes to bed because he gets up so early for work. *sigh*

It's like we're living at completely different times...and honestly, it's frustrating the hell outta me...if this is how the rest of the semester is going to be...*shakes head*...


I'm really worried about him anyway...a couple Sundays ago, he seemed like he really need to hear God say something...then he had some BIG questions a few nights ago...and now, he's asked me to be praying for him...he doesn't do that unless something is really wrong...but I don't know what it is! I really just want to take him somewhere so we can talk...I want to help him, to support him, to be there by his side as he walks the path the Lord has set before him...even if he can't see where the path leads. Part of the reason why I so look forward to being his wife...I'll get to do all that...mhm...I can't wait...anyway...I'm really, really worried about him...

I can't ever seem to tell him that though because I never see him...and he's not very good about answering his phone...or text messages...which can be rather frustrating when I'm trying to have a conversation with him.


I was so excited to get to see him tonight...I didn't even care that I'd have to share him because he wanted to get a Tripoley group together. I was even more excited after my day at work because of everything that happened there. I just wanted to share it with him. But he got out of play practice late and then went straight back to his place...all I ended up getting was a "goodnight" and "pray for me" sort of text...talk about mood killer...for one, I miss him like crazy and for two, now I'm concerned about him. But no...he's probably sound asleep by now and if I do see him tomorrow, it'll be during chapel...yay...


*sigh*


Abba, please...give me patience and strength to deal with whatever comes my way. And please, be with him. Give him the knowledge he's looking for and peace to deal with what he can't. Wrap him in your loving arms and shine your light upon him. Keep him safe. And help me to support and help him in any way possible and help me to show him how much he means to me. Help me be the woman he deserves. And please, Abba, be with us as we journey forth into the uncharted (for us) territory of engagement and eventually, marriage. Guide us, lead us, watch over us, and love us as we journey along. Thank you, Abba, for everything you've done for me, for him, for the both of us. You are truly amazing. Amen