My mom popped up a chat with me on Facebook. I was excited because I haven't talked to her in awhile and while we do have more than our share of issues, I do miss her. But after this conversation...?
"I'd appreciate more than you know if you could babysit that night for me!"
"I think I can...why?"
"Because I have a date"
*facepalm*
"Actually I have a fourth date"
"With who?"
"Someone I know from high school"
*Facebook stalks* *shudders because he looks like my grandpa*
"He's being very gentlemanly. Hasn't tried to touch me at all! We're taking things very slow."
"That's what you said about the other three guys you've had relationships with..."
"But this time is different"
Glad it's different just because you have decided not to have sex...maybe this relationship will last longer than a couple months...or maybe there will be less ex drama involved...
Ugh...
This is one of those times which I feel like I was born in the wrong era. I am all for the kind of relationship where the guy asks permission to hold your hand or to kiss you, where he gives you flowers just because, where you sit on the porch swing (or couch if necessary) just talking and getting to know each other...where you give each other time to have true feelings for each other, deep feelings that last.
Not this new kind of relationship where after a week, you must be meant to be together and that makes it okay to have sex. After a month, you're left broken and feeling used and you "can't believe I wasted all that time with him".
Thank you, Abba...for giving me a relationship like the first option...even if others think otherwise (you're wrong!!)
It's really disturbing to hear about your mother's sexual activity. I'm one of those kids who believes her parents had sex three times...and that's how me, my brother and my sister got here. That's it.
Yet here she is, searching for the need and love that she once had when she was married to my father, finding it in all the wrong places...acting like a dude who thinks with his...well...not his brain.
I shouldn't be surprised seeing as she told me that if I wanted to become sexually active before I got married then to let her know so I could get started on the pill or she could get me some condoms. Yes, she did add that she didn't want me to have sex but that she couldn't tell me know. So instead, with each new boyfriend in high school, I got the same talk...*shivers* that would be a HELL NO! Waiting until I'm married, thank you very much.
She says she's looking for someone to make her happy again and that she wants someone to make happy again.
After being up here at school and going through everything I have in the past couple years, I have realized something.
You don't need to be happy.
No matter what people say, it's not necessary. Yes, it's nice...quite wonderful actually. I love being happy.
But you don't need to be happy.
Trying to make sure you're always happy in life can actually cause you to be very unhappy.
I have learned that instead of needing to be happy, you need to be content. Being content does not always mean you're happy. It means you take what you have and make the most of it. Once you have mastered the art of being content (which I'm getting really very good at), I think you will be truly happy. If you take what you are given and make the most of it instead of worrying, complaining, arguing, despairing or anything of the life, then you can be happy.
Being content can lead to being happy.
So, be content with the job you have, the family you have, the friends you have...the life you have...instead of going out and causing yourself unhappiness and regret and anger and depression and all that just to be "happy"
Doesn't seem very happy to me...
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